Finding Balance in the Hustle Culture

I feel like we constantly receive the message, especially from social media, that if we’re not “hustling” to make something happen or to be a better person or to make more money, then we aren’t trying hard enough. I know this is prevalent for both men and women – social media constantly setting the bar high for achievement for all of us – and it can be difficult to find balance in the hustle culture.

#GIRLBOSS

When we look at women in the workforce specifically, there is the idea of a “Girl Boss,” a term made popular by Sophia Amoruso’s 2014 autobiography, #Girlboss. A girl boss is a woman who makes her way in a male-dominated business world, rising to the top, making things happen and a lot of money along the way. The hashtags of #girlboss and subsequent #bossbabe are all over social media these days, and the women who use them thrive on the idea of being more and achieving more.

The problem with the idea of a girl boss or boss babe however, is that it puts pressure on a woman to believe that if she is not constantly on her A-game, working long hours, being perfect on social media, making more money – well then, she isn’t achieving high enough. These concepts set women up to feel like failures.

In boss babe culture, hustle is celebrated, overwork is romanticized as “CEO level shit,” and burnout is a normal side effect of a job well done. There is no time to heal and rest, for fear of being accused of “not wanting it bad enough. 

Source: https://www.statementmedia.co/articles/heybabe

I WANT TO DO IT ALL

Is it wrong to want to work hard? Absolutely not. Is it wrong to want to excel in your position? Definitely not. Is it wrong to want to make more money? Again, no. But when we do these things and lose sight of balance in our lives, or we push ourselves so hard that we breakdown, that’s when it becomes problematic. When we ignore our relationships to focus on achievement, we get out of balance. When we sacrifice sleep or our health in the name of success, we have a problem.

The hustle culture permeates our non-working lives too. We see some moms on social who can seem to do it all – the cooking, the yard work, the Pinterest-worthy birthday parties, all while raising happy, balanced children. Or we have those friends who are always seem do be doing something – traveling, working out, going out on the town. It’s so easy to want to hustle right alongside in an attempt to do and be more.

There is also the hustle associated with personal development: the need to constantly be working on some facet of ourselves so much that it feels like all we are is a list of goals and theories. We can get so consumed with working on ourselves that we forget to actually exist.

I personally guilty of getting caught up in hustle culture. I want to be successful at my sales job. I want to grow my accounts and make more money so that not only is my company more successful, but I am too. I also bartend part time, working to make as much cash each time I’m behind the bar. And this blog? I want it to thrive and hope to one day monetize it. In addition to the blog, I am working on a book too that I hope to publish within the next couple of years. And then there’s the time I want to spend at the gym, the time I want to spend with my husband and kids, the traveling I want to do, the projects around the house that I want to do, the cooking I want to do. And then there’s the idea of personal development and wanting to work on myself, which takes time, thoughtfulness, and practice all in and of itself. Oof. I want to do so many things, and I can get so caught up in hustling to get it all done, that I get so out of whack mentally, physically, spiritually, and emotionally.

FINDING BALANCE

So how do we find balance? Here’s what I do:

1. Recognize that I am only one person with a limited number of hours in each day to get things done. There is only so much work, family time, and personal time I can fit into one day. At the beginning of each day, I map out my day, making the decisions for what I am able to accomplish that day so that I can prioritize what actually needs to be done verses what can wait. And then from there, I stay flexible because inevitably the day doesn’t go as planned, and I have to pivot and do something else.
2. Recognize that I don’t have to be the best at everything I do. I don’t have to outwork, out-hustle, out-smart anyone else. Comparing myself to others will only make me feel like a failure, but if I keep my eyes on my own paper, I can be much more content with what I have and what I am achieving. If I cut myself some slack, I am MUCH happier and can enjoy what I accomplish more than I would if I was to be hard on myself or critical of all the things I didn’t get done.
3. Get plenty of rest. A good night’s sleep is invaluable. I strive to get 8-10 hours a night. I know not everyone needs that much, so listen to your body and pay attention to what works best for you. In addition to a good night’s sleep, I schedule in naps on the weekend when I can and/or downtime to just lie in bed and watch Netflix or read a book. Getting enough rest helps to prevent burnout or exhaustion.
4. Unfollow people on social media. There have been people I have followed on Instagram and Facebook, both friends and celebrities or public figures, that when I see the content that they share, I find myself comparing my life, career, looks, athleticism, social circle, etc. to theirs. I feel like I am not doing enough or that I am not good enough. I feel like they have their lives all together or they’re constantly doing some thing and I’m not. I feel like I’m not working hard enough, but I’m not pretty enough, but I don’t invest in my family enough, and I just don’t feel good when I consume this type of content. For the longest time I would just keep looking at it and feeling like crap. But over time I have realize that I have a choice, and I don’t have to follow accounts like that.
5. Step back and look at the bigger picture. It is so easy to narrow our focus on whatever project or goal is right in front of us, but taking a minute to look up and take in our surroundings – our relationships, our attitudes, our priorities – will do so much to keep us balanced. I frequently get so caught up in a goal or a project that it becomes my sole focus. But when I take the time to look around at my life, I can see that I am sacrificing friendships or family time or my health in the name of productivity. Once I can see this, it helps me take a small step back into balance.

Doing these five things helps me to stay balanced. I don’t do it perfectly, but I’m much better than I used to be. And I still have goals. I still work hard. But I give myself the grace to not hustle all the time.

What helps you stay balanced? I would love to hear from you in the comments.

Until next time,

Jeri Austin